Merlin Shock

[Deleted]

In work today i was flicking through the pages of that piece of journalistic genius - The Daily Star - when my eyes were drawn away from some young woman's ample charms to this shock revelation . Now bear in mind if it's in the Daily Star , then it must be true . Quote -

King Arthur's legendary wizard Merlin was real and Hailed from GLASGOW rather than England or Wales , a new book has claimed .


So there you go mate , your secret is out . I shall have the red and white scarf and hat on order for you ready for the Scottish Cup matches . ;D

[admin]

You'll be claiming Ibrox is Camelot next.

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Well now you come to mention it .............

[Deleted]

I thought it was

Champions League here we come

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It was in more than the Daily Star; even the Edinburgh Evening News carried a bit about it.

I was rather hoping that that little snippet of news would be missed by the eagle eyes of the greater-thirsted Paulcowl. (Excuse the bit of a mixed bird metaphor!)

I shall now have to go and reinvent myself. What a downer! I don't suppose you'd believe that in those days Glasgow was actually a part of Edinburgh? No? Well give me time- there must be another explanation.

[admin]

I take comfort in the knowledge that not even the Daily Star would print something so ridiculous as Genghis Khan being a heathen.

[Deleted]

admin said:

You'll be claiming Ibrox is Camelot next.

Would the old mongol stay off the bloody tic-tacs.

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admin said:

I take comfort in the knowledge that not even the Daily Star would print something so ridiculous as Genghis Khan being a heathen.

Well actually there is an obscure historical fact known only to a few . The mighty Mongol Warlord was actually a bit of a pussy in his formative years .
What happened was - Genghis's father was assaninated by his rival gang leaders , and the rest of the Khan family had to dissappear sharpish . Young Genghis , being a bit of a mummy's boy , and the rest of the brood clung onto their mother's apron and wound up at their more violent relations , Uncle Jimmy and Auntie Isa , in the Easterhouse area of Glasgow .
In these little known years of exile Genghis mother supported her brood plying her trade down at Anderston Cross , while the young Genghis was taken under Uncle Jimmy's wing and spent the weekends getting drunk on cheap wine and fighting with rival gangs .
Twas only after being done for benefit fraud and spending three months in Barlinnie prison for sticking the nut on a polis , that Genghis was deported back to his homeland to use all the experience gained on the streets of Glasgow to be the feared Mongol warrior history remembers .

[schumi]

paulco said:

while the young Genghis was taken under Uncle Jimmy's wing and spent the weekends getting drunk on cheap wine and fighting with rival gangs .

I think he might be a relative of mine.

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paulco said:

admin said:

I take comfort in the knowledge that not even the Daily Star would print something so ridiculous as Genghis Khan being a heathen.

Well actually there is an obscure historical fact known only to a few . The mighty Mongol Warlord was actually a bit of a pussy in his formative years .
What happened was - Genghis's father was assaninated by his rival gang leaders , and the rest of the Khan family had to dissappear sharpish . Young Genghis , being a bit of a mummy's boy , and the rest of the brood clung onto their mother's apron and wound up at their more violent relations , Uncle Jimmy and Auntie Isa , in the Easterhouse area of Glasgow .
In these little known years of exile Genghis mother supported her brood plying her trade down at Anderston Cross , while the young Genghis was taken under Uncle Jimmy's wing and spent the weekends getting drunk on cheap wine and fighting with rival gangs .
Twas only after being done for benefit fraud and spending three months in Barlinnie prison for sticking the nut on a polis , that Genghis was deported back to his homeland to use all the experience gained on the streets of Glasgow to be the feared Mongol warrior history remembers .

Brillant. ;D

[Deleted]

paulco said:

admin said:

I take comfort in the knowledge that not even the Daily Star would print something so ridiculous as Genghis Khan being a heathen.

Well actually there is an obscure historical fact known only to a few . The mighty Mongol Warlord was actually a bit of a pussy in his formative years .
What happened was - Genghis's father was assaninated by his rival gang leaders , and the rest of the Khan family had to dissappear sharpish . Young Genghis , being a bit of a mummy's boy , and the rest of the brood clung onto their mother's apron and wound up at their more violent relations , Uncle Jimmy and Auntie Isa , in the Easterhouse area of Glasgow .
In these little known years of exile Genghis mother supported her brood plying her trade down at Anderston Cross , while the young Genghis was taken under Uncle Jimmy's wing and spent the weekends getting drunk on cheap wine and fighting with rival gangs .
Twas only after being done for benefit fraud and spending three months in Barlinnie prison for sticking the nut on a polis , that Genghis was deported back to his homeland to use all the experience gained on the streets of Glasgow to be the feared Mongol warrior history remembers .

The post of the year, Paulco! ;D ;D ;D

Jeez that is such an accurate depiction of life in Weegieland! ;D

[Deleted]

Aye, the only bit missing was the fried mars bars

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merlin said:

Jeez that is such an accurate depiction of life in Weegieland! ;D

Well you should know - oh great wizard . You are one of us after all . ;D

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paulco said:

merlin said:

Jeez that is such an accurate depiction of life in Weegieland! ;D

Well you should know - oh great wizard . You are one of us after all . ;D

Nah - the Glasgow welcome put me off.

When a visitor arrives in Glasgow they get the traditional welcome - they get covered in batter then they're deep-fried.

In the old days they just used to be marinated in the Buckfast before being spit roasted. Nothing worse than being roasted in saliva - yeuch!

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merlin said:

In the old days they just used to be marinated in the Buckfast before being spit roasted. Nothing worse than being roasted in saliva - yeuch!

Well that and getting abused on Easy-Tiger